Parenting after separation: useful resources

Books for Parents

Parenting Apart by Christina McGhee (ISBN 0425232123). Available from Amazon.
This comprehensive and empowering guide from acclaimed expert Christina McGhee offers practical and effective ways to minimize the impact of separation on your children and to strengthen the bond between you.

Co-Parenting 101: Helping Your Children Thrive after Divorce by Deesha Philyaw and Michael Thomas (ISBN: 1608824632). Available from Amazon.
Co-Parenting 101 is based on the premise that co-parenting is a must, not an option. The involvement of both parents – not just the primary guardian – is the cornerstone of successful co-parenting. This is the first book written by a formerly married couple for whom co-parenting is central to their day to day lives, and it offers a comprehensive, personal, and upfront look at how to effectively raise kids with an ex-spouse.

Pocket guide for parents who live apart ‘what most children say’
Available from Kent Family Mediation Service
www.kentfms.co.uk
01795 429689

How to talk so kids will listen & listen so kids will talk by Elaine Mazlish and Adele Faber (ISBN 1848123094). Available from Amazon.
Although this book does not directly focus on the consequences of divorce, it aims to provide new, innovative techniques to solve problems with children and consequently make parent/child relationships less stressful and more fulfilling.

Helping children cope with divorce by Rosemary Wells (ISBN 078795554X). Available from Amazon.
Voted one of the 10 Best Parenting Books by Child Magazine, this post-divorce parenting guide offers good advice about practical and emotional problems to help you minimize stress and explain divorce so that children don’t feel responsible.

The Truth About Children and Divorce: Dealing with the Emotions So You and Your Children Can Thrive by Robert E. Emery Ph.D. (ISBN 0452287162). Available from Amazon.
Drawing upon his 25 years of experience as researcher, therapist and mediator, Robert Emery offers parents a new means of navigating divorce including how to manage the potentially toxic feelings resulting from divorce, dealing with daily tasks, talking to children, creating a mutual workable parenting schedule and dealing with legal issues.

Mom’s House, Dad’s House: Making Two Homes for Your Child by Isolina Ricci (ISBN 0684830787). Available from Amazon.
This groundbreaking guide, considered a classic by professionals, deals with the legal, emotional and financial realities of creating two happy and stable homes for children in the often difficult, unsettling and confusing aftermath of divorce.

Putting your Children First – a guide for separating parents by CAFCASS (Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service) Free downloadable version available at http://www.cafcass.gov.uk/leaflets-resources/leaflets-for-adults.aspx

Putting Children First: A handbook for Separated Parents by Karen and Nick Woodall (ISBN 1608824632). Available from Amazon.
Putting Children First helps mothers and fathers unlock and resolve the conflict around contact with children that can arise during and after separation by highlighting strategies that enable parents to communicate effectively regarding their children.

Books for Children

Jack by Helen Bishop
A book for young children involved in family breakups. Jack speaks to his friend Black Cat who is able to talk Jack through his concerns and worries, and provide him with some practical advice on how to make life a little easier, which makes Jack feel more confident and reassured.
For more information please visit www.jackandblackcat.com Available from Amazon and Waterstones.

Two homes by Claire Masurel (ISBN 0744589258). Available from Amazon.
This portrayal of the life of a child whose parents are divorced is for very young children, to reassure them that the affection and warmth between them and their parents has not altered despite their parents living apart.

Dinosaur’s divorce by Marc Brown and Laurie Krasny Brown. Available from Amazon.

Was it the chocolate pudding: A story for little kids about divorce by Sandra Levins and Bryan Langdo. Available from Amazon.

Divorce helpbook for kids by Cynthia Macgregor. Available from Amazon.

Suitcase kid by Jacqueline Wilson. Available from Amazon.

Mom’s House, Dad’s House for kids by Isolina Ricci. Available from Amazon.

Face-to-face help

Counselling

Relate
www.relate.org.uk
Relate offers relationship advice and information for separated or separating parents helping you to deal with the effects of separation on your family and how to minimize the impact it has on your children.
National office: 0845 456 1310
Lincolnshire office: 01522 524520

Marilyn Merry (Relate Lincolnshire Centre Manager)
Email: marilynmerry@btconnect.com
Tel: 01522 524520

Denise Pickup
www.relationshipwork.co.uk
Tel: 01522 518689
Denise offers relationship counseling for separated and divorced couples to enable them to establish new patterns of communication if contact is to be maintained, for example because a child is involved. She also offers Mentalization training for particularly conflicted or unresolved parenting issues.

Sue Daniels
Jigsaw Counselling & Consultancy Services
www.traumacounselling.co.uk
Tel: 01507 608020

Helpful websites

Resolution
www.resolution.org.uk
08457 585671
Organisation that promotes a non-confrontational approach to family problems and encourages solutions that consider the needs of the whole family with particular emphasis on those of the children involved.

Divorce and Children
www.divorceandchildren.com
Divorce coach and parent educator Christina McGhee offers helpful information and practical advice on how to deal with inevitable family change following divorce or separation.

The Parent Connection
www.theparentconnection.org.uk
This website is replete with information and advice for ‘parenting after parting’. 

Family Action
www.family-action.org.uk
Family Action is England’s leading family charity. Its services help over 45,000 disadvantaged children and families each year. Family Action offers innovative services to support both children and parents, with the aim of improving the quality of relationships between parents and children and their wider kinship and social networks.

One Plus One
www.oneplusone.org.uk
This site offers information and advice on how to deal with the emotional and personal issues arising from separation and how to approach post-break up parenting.

Splitting Up? Put Kids First – Help to prepare a Parenting Plan
www.homestart.splittingup-putkidsfirst.org.uk
Home-Start Lincoln have partnered with OnePlusOne to develop their ‘Splitting Up? Put Kids First’ programme. To help you begin a co-parenting routine after separation they have developed a unique online service which enables you to create an agreed plan for your child’s support and care. You can access the service yourself or they can work with you to help you complete the programme onl
Tel: 01522 569997/525752
Email: homestartlincoln@btconnect.com

Home-Start Lincoln
www.homestartlincoln.org.uk
1 High Street, Lincoln, LN5 8BQ
Practical and emotional support including befriending for any parent who has a child under 11 years old living with them.
Tel: 01522 569997/525752
Email: homestartlincoln@btconnect.com

One Space
www.onespace.org.uk
A site for single parents offering expert guidance on debt and benefit issues, legal advice, single parenting and relationships.

Kids in the Middle
www.kidsinthemiddle.org.uk
An online peer support website for children who have experienced/are experiencing separation.

Sorting out separation App
www.sortingoutseparation.org.uk
Powered by the Help and Support for Separated Families initiative, this interactive service offers support relating to all consequences of separation to help you deal with relationship breakdown.

Family Lives
www.familylives.org.uk
Online support for parents which focuses on the emotional and practical anxieties arising from separation.
Helpline: 0808 800 2222

Gingerbread
Tel: 0808 8020925
www.gingerbread.org.uk 

Association of Shared Parenting
Tel: 0116 326 0555 (East Midlands Branch)
www.sharedparenting.org.uk

Parentline Plus
Tel: 0808 8002222
www.parentlineplus.org.uk

Families Need Fathers
Tel: 0300 0300363
www.fnf.org.uk

Raising Children network
www.raisingchildren.net.au

Partnership for Children
www.partnershipforchildren.org.uk